God is great, but sometimes life ain't good....

Martina McBride's song continues...'and when I pray it doesn't always turn out like I think it should; but I do it anyway.'  What is prayer but hope in someone or something greater than you who can make things better. Hope that life will turn out good. And when it doesn't....it's easier to give up and let things just happen. Que sera, sera.

Yes. Danny has been unjustly sentenced, facing a lengthy jail time that even surprises the murderers he's met in jail who are facing less time.

Yes. Marisa is having the worst, most painful LUPUS flare-up in her young life. But...

NO! I refuse to accept that life won't get better. The most amazing children are standing strong with me. They not only support me, but each other. I have an amazing family, who are standing by my side. I have loving, wind-beneath-my-wings friends who are ready to work against the injustice my family has experienced. And, helping me stay sane is the man I love, Stephen.

"I sing....I dream...I love...Anyway" 

I love listening to this...Daniel's Solo at High School Concert in 2012

1 Year Later...

A year has passed since Danny's arrest on January 2013. So much has happened. So many emotions. So many tears.

On December 17, 2013 Danny was sentenced to 16 years in state prison. 16 f**ng years!! You would think my son killed or attempted to kill someone. Danny...former honor student, president of the high school band, lead in high school play, member of the student government plus much more. Danny...loved by many. Danny...my son, caring brother to 5 and true friend.

To this day I do not understand why he was sentenced to sooo many years. What good will that do anyone? No one benefits from his being locked up. Just as important, it doesn't even help the victims. Danny's being locked up doesn't help them at all! He can't even pay a decent amount of restitution making $0.40/hr. What a joke! Yes, a joke. A bad joke. That's what it feels like. No, we're not laughing. We cry. My family and I cry. That's what we did on December 17, 2013. We cried and cried and cried. We couldn't believe the injustice. Why send a 19-year old to state prison for 16 years? 

I was advised by Danny's lawyers not to say anything negative about the sentencing judge or the DA during the appeal process. It might backfire. I can't help but wonder, though...why? why? why? Why would a judge dismiss all Danny did during the past year to better himself. As the court instructed, Danny addressed his drug and alcohol issues by attending three rehab centers. For most of the year, Danny was away from home taking care of himself. He successfully completed the treatments. His counselors from each center wrote letters to the court stating Danny's progress. 

The judge dismissed EVERYTHING Danny had done. He told Danny he didn't believe drugs and alcohol were the reason for Danny's crimes. He told Danny, he was a typical teenager who just likes to get drunk during the first year at college. He basically told Danny, you are scum and deserve to spend almost 20 years in jail. 

It's been two months....I still can't get over it. Never will.

On your mark. Get set. GO! Let the Blogging begin!

My first blog!

I love journaling. Writing down my thoughts, feelings - good, bad or indifferent - helps me work through the challenges I face. Blogging seems to be a natural progression for me from journaling. Why? Mainly, because I want to share with the others the journey I'm on.

It all began in what seems like an eternity ago, January 2013. Everyone was home from school for the holidays. The house was full of joy and laughter. I love when all the kids are home! Danny was staying with Jocelyn in Albany since he began attending Hudson County Community College. He wasn't ready for school and asked if he could withdraw. He did and began working in Albany, but in January decided to stay home and not to go back to Albany. He was going to take some time off from school, look for work and plan his future. Nothing went according to plans.

In what seemed like a normal day in January, Danny was asked to stop by the police station. I was told he might have some information regarding a crime that was committed in Mountaindale. Little did I know, he was going to be interrogated and charged with several burglaries. Danny always had a good relationship with the police in our town. He even babysat for the police chief several years ago. Danny trusted the police and confessed to not only the burglary he was being interrogated on, but to others the police were not even aware of. He wanted to make it right.

Danny was arrested that night...the night the nightmare for me and my family began...